Cancer boy had a really good day yesterday - I came home to ripped up trash! And, he yanked the plastic rain gauge out of the snow-covered flowerbed, ran far away from me in an attempt to conceal the forbidden object, and started crunching on it in his old naught way. I never thought I'd say this, but - those antics really made my day!!! Heck, it made my month!!!

Unfortunately, his pain this morning was the worst I've ever seen since this whole ordeal started. He woke me up at 3am, sitting tall beside me on the bed, just hovering over and staring at me intently. Weird. He does love to say hi, but not in the middle of the night. He also had his "Hi Mom, I've got something to tell you" look on. His are very expressive eyes and ears, which I am very attuned to. I can read his mind, read his emotions, just by looking at his face. He tries to snuggle, but tosses and turns, tosses and turns. Jumps off the bed, plops on the floor, stands up, gets on the bed. Repeat 10x.

I let him out, and rather than sniff around excitedly, he just runs out and then plops down on the snow to rest. Very unusual, very alarming. Not to mention, I could feel muscle spasms on his bad leg, and he was totally non-weight-bearing on it. Would trot on it, but would lift it up in the air while on a sit or stand.

The highs are really high, and the lows, well...

Off to the vet we go again, as soon as they opened. Took x-rays to make sure it wasn't a fracture. I was convinced it was, based on his utter restlessness and ocassional groaning. (It wasn't) Asked the vet if it was time, since I was in panic mode over these behavioral changes. This is not the dog I know. She said "not yet, he's still got a lot of life in him" True. He did follow me around all morning inspite of the pain. Though that could be because he sticks by me when he's frightened (e.g. loud, scary noises make him scurry towards his mom/dad, very endearing...). And, he did wag his tail as usual, and ate his breakfast heartily.

So, we're on a wait-and-see approach again. Added gabapentin to his list of pain meds. The pharmacist asked me if the meds were for seizures. Interesting - must be good stuff! I'll see what happens after the intravenous pamidronate tomorrow and the acupuncture on Monday.

Seeing him in pain is really the hardest. And I know it's not going to get better from this point onwards. I was prepared to hear the worst from the vet, would have been relieved almost, to tell you the truth. But she seemed to think it was just a bump in the road. I trust her completely. Though she did say to start bracing myself.